2020 – Year of Revelation

Who knew 2020 would be a year full of surprises?

I was not prepared at all for this year to turn out the way it did. I thought I was good at making adjustments, but I wasn’t good at it this year. None of us were alone in having to constantly pivot our schedules throughout the year. This year showed me more of myself than any other year with the exception of 2017.

Were you hit with the mirror as well? I think many of us were hit with a mirror so we could see who we really are even when others are not looking. I didn’t find any bad things about myself this time. I saw some insecurities though. Some of those insecurities I am still working on and it’s been great.

The biggest challenge for me was dealing with revelations from people in my inner circle. It’s amazing how you see people for who they really are when times are tough. Some people really don’t deal with stress well at all. I witnessed so many people struggle with anxiety. The “not knowing what’s coming next” really is a challenge for more people than I realized at the time. I felt bad because I became overwhelmed trying to handle other people and their insecurities and anxieties.

I had to slow down and reevaluate how I should be more considerate and empathetic. I have always had my own anxieties…but “not knowing what’s coming next” usually was not one of them. I was always the one person that appreciated moving on to the next thing without thinking too much. I understand more now why it makes people nervous to not have schedules and routines. I understand now how not being able to keep up with your routine can be very disruptive for your life. This was a huge learning lesson for me.

I also learned there are just some people who are selfish. They were selfish at 10, 20, and still selfish at over 40. We have to learn to set boundaries with people. There are some people in your inner circle that are just toxic. Don’t trick yourself into thinking they will change because it will not happen. The best gift to yourself is self-care. If you can’t kick that person out of your life, then set boundaries with them. Stop running to them every time they call for something! Stop it right now! Please don’t go into 2021 doing the same things. Break the chains. Destroy generational curses now.

The biggest lesson and revelation for me was that there are many generational curses. It exists in many forms. I just want to tell people this: you don’t have to do things the way your mom, dad, grandma, grandpa, or aunt did it. If it was healthy and it worked – that’s great! Keep it! If it wasn’t healthy and productive – discard it! You don’t have to hold on to everything just because it was “the way it was always done”. We have to get away from this old thinking. It doesn’t serve anybody. It’s a chain that holds you back. Do what you think is best for your own children. Do what you think is best for your own nieces and nephews. People mean well – but they don’t always know everything!

I pray for peace in 2021. This is not about me at all. I pray for this whole world. I really do mean it. I pray for peace for all households. I want everyone to do the work. I pray specifically for these things to happen:

1) I want people to do their homework. This means you work on yourself first. Stop pointing fingers when you don’t have it all together.

2) I want others to help those in their inner circle who are struggling. I am not talking about financially because everyone might not have money to help out. Yet, we all have the means to help in some way. If you have a close family member struggling with addiction – don’t just ignore them. Please help them. Please help them help themselves. We all need to do a better job as a community to help those who are struggling with mental illness and addiction. I have seen what mental illness and addiction can do to families. I have decided to make it my mission in 2021 to do more in this area.

3) Please learn to apologize/make amends to those in your inner circle who have hurt you. Please have the conversation. Even if the conversation doesn’t go as planned – you can still say you did your part. You can actively move on and pray for them from afar. Notice I said, “from afar”. That’s right. You don’t need to be around the toxicity. Never stop praying for them.

4) Be the change. This is a big one! I admit this is a big one. Sometimes you have to be the one to show others what “the right thing to do” looks like. It doesn’t look like a doormat either. Some people have never seen what “good” looks like. They need a lesson. They need tutors. We need more tutors in our communities. Let’s start with our families first and then work our way out. We can do this! Let’s all start holding each other accountable.

Much love to you all! I hope 2021 will be even better for you. I hope you receive all the love and joy. Blessings.